1. Never change yourself to be like someone else, be like yourself and make a difference.
2. God is dead, it was the big bang that killed her.
3. If you want to improve, be content to be thought foolish and stupid.
4. I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours.
5. Geniuses are misunderstood. I'm misunderstood. I'm a genius.
6. If we're not supposed to use swear words, then why do they exist.
7. When you are right no one remembers; when you are wrong no one forgets.
8. Everybody got it wrong. I said I was into porn again, not born again.
9. How many people died from the Kama Sutra, as opposed to the Bible? Who wins?
10. I'm not crazy, my reality is simply different than yours.
11. You can't hear it, but the universe is laughing at you behind your back.
12. The difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer is in the taste.
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